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  • Deathbed Reflection

Monday, June 17, 2024 / Published in Christian Living Today, Discipleship, Families, Featured Posts, Newspaper Articles, Spirit, Mind, Body & Relationships

Deathbed Reflection

This is Pastor Tim’s article which appeared in the Evening Leader on Tuesday, June 18, 2024

 

When I read an editorial, I tend to take them at face value.  Just like these articles of mine that you are kind enough to read, you know that for the most part, these are my opinions.  I write them to express my thoughts about whatever topic.  As I have had to explain many times, opinions are neither right nor wrong.  An opinion is something you believe.  I would not recommend having an opinion that is false, but you and I both have witnessed many people doing just that.

 

I just read an article that was an opinion piece that I would like to take issue with.  The article appeared on the CNBC website.  If you know anything about me and if you know anything about CNBC, you can imagine that there is not much common ground between us.  I pay attention to CNBC when I want to laugh because fiction can be fun.

 

Earlier this morning, an article showed up on CNBC’s website that caught my attention because it was about something that I have far more experience with than I wish I had.  It was an article written by someone named Ashton Jackson.  I do not know Ashton, to be honest, I don’t even know if the name Ashton is a boy or girl name and I don’t care enough to check.   The article is titled: Top 5 regrets people have when they die, says ex-hospice care worker – many don’t realize them ‘until the end.’

 

In this article, Ashton interviewed a worker named Siddhartha Mukherjee.  Again, I do not know this person either, but given their first name, I would guess they are of the Buddhist faith.  I find Buddhism to be one of the more interesting and fascinating of the 7 major world religions.  Besides Christianity, of the 6 remaining world religions, Buddhism is the one I respect the most.

 

Which is why I found this article baffling.  According to the article, the #1 regret that people have on their deathbed is that they did not live true to themselves.  I can tell you that has not been the experience I have had at all.  In fact, I have never heard anyone even suggest anything like this and I have had dozens of these conversations through the years.  I know that I have not had as many of these conversations as a hospice care worker would have, but I have had enough of them to know that if this truly was the #1 concern, I would have heard it at some point and I simply have not.

 

The biggest regret I have heard from dying people is they wish they would have been better to other people, not to themselves.  I read this article twice and maybe they are twisting this very common sentiment to say that people wish they had been true to themselves by being better to other people, but that does not seem to me to be what this article is saying.  The last thing people on their deathbed want to talk about is themselves.  The conversation is always about the people they care about and all of the missed opportunities to care for those people.  I would not define that sentiment as someone wishing they had been more true to themselves.

 

Which brings be back to the author of the article.  I think that the person here who wants to throw off responsibility and live how they want is Ashton.  Think about how much stuff you could do for yourself now if you were living your life to please no one but yourself?  You could be happy every day and I am sure that living a life pursuing every selfish thing you wanted would not be something you would regret on your deathbed.  If there is something that all actively dying people wish they had done is made themselves happier.  Does that even sound correct to you?

 

If you knew that today was going to be your last day, what would you do differently?  I sincerely doubt you would focus on being true to yourself.  Of all of the people I have met who knew they were in their last days, all they wanted to do was show love to the people they loved most.  People who are actively dying become the most selfless people you will ever meet.

 

While I appreciate Ashton giving me the motivation to write this article, I find it incredibly hard to believe that most people spend their final hours regretting not doing more for themselves.  I just don’t buy it.

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